Love Archives | The Rakstar

Acne? Who Me?

The Rakstar — Wed, 05 Jun 2024 20:10:08 +0000

Rising Above the Stigma

Disclosure: An Open Conversation About Acne. Not meant to hurt anyone’s feelings. This is just a rant – an opinion piece.

We want to make it clear that our intention here is not to hurt or offend anyone. The Rakstar understands that acne is a sensitive topic and we want to create a safe and supportive space for discussion and reflection.

“Don’t judge me. I see you’re rolling your eyes up and down at my face. It’s obvious and quite rude. I don’t say anything because frankly I don’t want to get into the whole situation. Maybe you feel sorry for me and maybe just maybe you are thankful it’s not you. Maybe you feel better, high and mighty and think you can rule me. But listen, you can’t. Acne is not some sort of disease that you need to step 10 feet away from me. No, it is not caused by eating bad greasy food or that we are dirty people. No, it’s not that we pick our skin or that we don’t wash our face. No, acne is something we are going through. Please we do not need your unsolicited advice. I have a dermatologist for that, thank you very much. Yes, I do feel insecure about it and it’s not because of me. It’s because of you. The way you look at me as if I am an alien from outer space. No I am human, thanks for asking. When I am alone, I’m calm. I’m fine. When I’m out with others, I’m self-conscious – waiting just waiting for someone to say something. Please don’t. If I want to ask for your help, I will ask.”

Have you ever felt the weight of judgmental stares and unwanted advice pouring your way? You are definitely not alone. Acne is a tear of hearts that many of us go through but it does not… I repeat Rakstars…does not define who we are. Let’s set the record straight in a supportive space so that we each can feel better about ourselves and our skin.

Stigma?

Let’s talk about the zebra in the room—those judgmental stares and eye rolls and condescending tone. Yes! You’ve seen it and unfortunately, we have all been there. It’s as if having acne is some sort of disease where we are put under a microscope for everyone to just scrutinize and think they are better. But here’s the truth, Acne, as scary as it may sound, is not a contagious disease and it’s definitely not a reflection of our hygiene nor our lifestyle choices. Yep you heard right!

Misconceptions!

Acne often gets a bad reputation where people think it’s caused by us eating greasy food, being dirty or not taking care of our skin. Really you don’t say? (We can be condescending too, if we wanted but we are kind) If it was that easy to get rid of Acne, don’t you think we would be taking care of all those things by now? But let’s remove these myths once and for all. Acne is known medically as Acne vulgaris – a skin condition which is influenced by genetics, hormones and other factors. It’s not our fault that we have acne and we shouldn’t feel ashamed or embarrassed of it.

The Unsolicited Advice!

Ah, the unsolicited advice. You have heard it! Haven’t you?

“You should eat more vegetables.”

“You should wash your face with cold water.”

“You should stop eating chocolate.” (Never!)

“When my cousin’s daughter’s best friend’s cat’s friend’s neighbor’s daughter had acne – she used this special cream that was found in the Amazon forest – you should try it. It cleared her skin in a day.” (Really, Aunt Marge – thank goodness you are not a Doctor.)

We’ve all been there, Rakstars. Friends, family members and even strangers offering their “miracle” solutions to our acne misery woes. But here’s the deal and don’t take this the wrong way. We have dermatologists and medical estheticians for that. We’ve got our skin care routines in check and we’re doing our best to manage our acne. We appreciate your concern (not really), but please respect our choices and our boundaries. And as much as you think that giving your advice is helping it has the opposite effect, making us feel more conscious about our skin. The fact that you brought it up makes us feel that we are looking like a giraffe at a penguin park.

Emotions ride the Rollercoaster

Acne can bolt us down on the rollercoaster called Our Self-esteem. This is not because of us. It’s because of how others perceive us. The way people look at us. The judgmental looks! The whispered comments! All of it adds up. When we are alone, we can be at peace with ourselves, but in social situations, we often become self-conscious, waiting for someone to say something mean or hurtful or give that unsolicited advice or just stare at the pimple itself like it will magically pop. So here’s a simple request: please don’t. If we need advice, we will reach out. In the meantime, a little empathy and some understanding can go a long way. It’s not easy having Acne.

Empowerment & Self-Love

Living with acne is definitely a rollercoaster that doesn’t end straight away. It is not something that can be cured overnight, but it doesn’t define our worth. Rakstars, we are so much more than our skin. So why can’t we support each other, lift each other up and remember that we’re all humans with beautiful experiences. Acne is just one chapter of our story and you know what, you know what (added for dramatic effect), we are the authors of our own lives.

Rakstars, remember that you are beautiful, both inside and out. Don’t let the judgments and misconceptions of other people dim your light. You are a full LED light bulb okay! You’ve got this. Embrace yourself and don’t be afraid to ask if you need help. Love Yourself! Rakstars, we can rise above the Acne stigma and we can create a world where we feel comfortable in our very own skin. You are beautiful with or without Acne, don’t you ever forget that!

: Photo by Anna Nekrashevich

: Photo by Ron Lach

: Photo by cottonbro studio

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Unlocking Inner Beauty: What I Wish I Was vs. What I Am

The Rakstar — Sat, 25 May 2024 20:35:06 +0000

Embrace Your Unique Self for Confidence and Happiness

You have a list, don’t you?

Come on, I know you do.

Don’t remember what I’m talking about?

Let me remind you.

The list you have about what you want to look like. Maybe it’s being tall or being skinny or maybe having big shoulders. Physical attributes that you know you can’t change. Our perceived imperfections. Perceived. You ask someone about you being short and they will say they love it. But you don’t. You ask someone about your weight and they will say it’s the same as theirs. You ask someone about your big shoulders and they will say they never noticed. Are imperfections may just be… perfections?

Let’s talk about something that’s been on our minds, some point or another. The way we look. Yes, our appearances. You, your friend, your parents, your teachers, your doctors, your dentist and even your neighbour.

Now do you remember that mental checklist of what you wish you looked like, the physical attributes you’d like to change, the “ideal” versions of ourselves that we imagine. But have you ever stopped to think about whether these perceived imperfections are really imperfections at all?

Skinnier?

Prettier?

Taller?

So what’s on your list? Did you think about it when you looked at yourself in the mirror?

Maybe you wish you were taller, skinnier or had perfect skin. It’s natural to have these thoughts. We all do. But here’s the thing: these are just perceptions, not facts. What you might see as imperfections aka things you don’t like, others might see as beautiful quirks that make you exceptionally you.

Have you ever asked someone else about these perceived flaws? I bet if you did, their response would surprise you. They might tell you that they love your height or that they don’t even notice that it’s a flaw. You see Rakstars, the imperfections we obsess over are often the very things that make us stand out in a crowd, like a Rockstar!

Pause for a moment and look at yourself in the mirror or in the camera app on your phone. Seriously, go ahead, take a look. Do you see yourself? Not just your reflection, but the real you! The you that’s made up of so much more than just an appearance. If you can look in that mirror and love what you see, confidence overrides insecurities and the right people will love it too.

Beauty is what radiates from our hearts and souls. Guess what? The more you embrace and enjoy your inner beauty, the more confident you will become in owning those perceived imperfections.

You are not a robot, nor are you an alien. So why on Earth would you act like one? We’re all human and that means we come in all shapes, sizes and colors. It’s time to stop stressing over what you can’t control and only focus on what you can.

Remember Rakstars, you have the power to change some things, like adopting healthier habits, exercising and staying hydrated. Taking care of yourself.

As for those perceived imperfections, you think are imperfections, well, they’re just that: perceived. No one ever said they were imperfections except for you. However, if someone does happen to make a negative comment about something you’re self-conscious about, remember, the issue might not be your “imperfection” but rather their insensitivity (or maybe just themselves in general).

So let’s be real, Rakstars, you are who you are. Celebrate this! Love your unique qualities and don’t stress on what you can’t control. Those perceived imperfections, remember, are just perceived. No one said it was an imperfection but you. Surround yourself with people who appreciate you for you and say bye to those who don’t. If someone does say something about it – use your better judgment. This perceived imperfection is not the problem, maybe hanging out with them is?

The only real imperfection here might be spending time with people who can’t see your inner beauty. Why hang out with people who put you down? Adios Amigos!

Rakstars, it’s your confidence, your kindness and your inner beauty that truly define you. So, let your light shine, because you are more than enough. It’s time to love yourself and your perceived imperfections. At the end of the day, you are a Rakstar!

You’ve got this! 💪😊

: Photo by Eric Torres

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