BOY MEETS MATH

The Rakstar Personal Finance Boy, Finance, Fun

(Disclaimer: Not real. Just for laughs)

Okay, so there is the trend of girl math, but what about boy math. There has to be, is there?

Boy Math is as unique as one’s DNA, leaving the rest of us scratching our heads in disbelief. But what actually happens inside a boy’s brain. Brace yourselves – we are heading through a new world voyage.

The ‘Messometry’ Formula

This equation (by no means, will it ever make sense) attempts to quantify the inexplicable occurence of messiness in the boy’s head:

(Number of Dirty Socks on the Floor (S) + Piles of Unwashed Clothes (C)) multiplied by The Number of Days He’s Been Ignoring Chores (CH) equals the Mess Quotient (MQ).

MQ = (S + C) x CH

The higher the MQ, the greater the mystifying temptation of living in a sugared mess. Solving this equation is like trying to decipher hieroglyphics; only a chosen few can truly comprehend its delicate intricacies.

The Gaming Calculus

In the world of gaming where one must unleash their inner battle skills of strategy and logic through defying calculations, one must hop through this equation to reign supreme:

Hours Spent Playing Video Games (H) divided by Number of Deaths (N) multiplied by Volume of Battle Cries (V) equals the Ultimate Gamer Efficiency Rate (UGER).

UGER = (H / N) x V

According to no textbook ever, UGER should always exceed 1.0 for maximum gaming glory rights. In other words, the louder someone yells when they conquer a level, the higher your UGER (Shoutout to my cousins!).

The Snackgebra

Precision meets hunger over here:

Number of Chips Eaten (N) divided by the Volume of Crumbs evidently on the floor (V) equals the Snack Satisfaction Coefficient (SSC).

SSC = N/ V

A high SSC means you’ve successfully enjoyed your snacks, not caring about any of the mess that you made, making your mother really, really, really angry right and don’t forget the collateral damage to the couch. Crumbs are just evidence of a snack well executed.

The Remote Equation

Do you know where the remote control is as we speak?

Frequency of Changing the Channel (F) multiplied by Number of Lost Remote Situations (N) divided by No availability ever to share the remote (R) equals the Remoteology Index (RI).

RI = (F x N) / R

This RI should ideally be inversely proportional to the importance of the TV event. The higher the RI during the championship game, the more crazy the logic.

Rakstars, this is a mysterious yet endearing blend of mess, some strategy, lots of snacking and remote control logic. It’s an equation where we mortals may never fully grasp, but that’s okay. After all, life would be much less entertaining without the delightful ideas of Boy Math. If you are ever baffled by a boy’s mathematical approach to life, just remember to smile – you are witnessing a unique form of brilliance in action! 🕹🍕📺🧦